Ruminating On Rumi

As you start to walk out on the way, the way appears.

~ M. Rumi

Saturday, June 30, 2012

Only the Lonely


Loneliness seems to me to be a sad symptom of a society concerned with the futile search for happiness in a desperate chase to acquire and consume. This focus on out there causes us to feel we are separate from all there is. 
There is a distinction between being alone and loneliness. I value being alone. Truly, in this time, I can settle into the presence of simply being. Being at one with what is present where all senses sharpen and self merges with the beloved. 
Yet, I do feel lonely. I miss the companionship and coexistence of living with others. These last few years of living alone with self are refreshing, revitalizing and such a sharp contrast to life of many, many years. Here now, there is the unique chance to focus on the fundamental nature of self. 
This self-awareness is valuable, relationship with self naturally evolves in to relationship with other even though relationship implies separation. It is the contrast that gives the opportunity to explore how singularity manifests into diversity. It is the field where we play as embodied beings waking up to the divine in all. 
In times of loneliness, I will go for a walk and smile at all the many faces of self. I try to remember even the word loneliness cradles oneness. 

Friday, June 29, 2012

Silly Me!!!


I used to think I was a light hearted care free person because I could so easily make puns. What I’ve discovered is that being a good punster only means a certain skill with words, a rather extensive vocabulary and a quick wit. If anything, attaining master punster status requires a certain tenacity based on the need to know. Sometimes I pun when I want to take away the seriousness of a situation or distract myself from really experiencing what’s going on the moment. Certainly, there are times when it’s in jest.

Of note though, punning often happens when others provide the fodder for the pun. That’s not necessarily fun for the one being punned. It can be considered rude or disrespectful or demeaning. It can leave the punnee scratching their head, thinking, “I don’t get it.” Yet punning with the co-operative play and participation of others can reach a state of hilarity and silliness. 
Though what I’m really saying is that I need to take life and myself a little less seriously. Punning is goal oriented. Just to stop reaching for undefined perfection and allow mistakes their due, yes to learn by, but also sometimes to completely, wholeheartedly with unabandoned pleasure laugh at. 
What I would care to cultivate is silliness. True, genuine, belly laughing, giggling, chortling, chuckling hilarity. Really, a sense of playfulness, with no goal at all just to laugh joyously in this moment. Attending laughter yoga can coax out that silly inner child. Play, smiles and laughter with others is a remedy for what ails us and as the well aged show us even perhaps the elixir for a long, happy time in the body here on earth.
A little groaner of a joke, What did the Buddha say to the Hot Dog Vendor?  Make me one with everything.

Monday, June 25, 2012

A Passing Thought

Saturday morning, upon hearing a galloping sound, I glanced outside. A rather largish buck with big horns was moving fairly fast through a narrow path in the garden. Without a pause he leapt over the six foot fence narrowly missing Shelley's Volvo parked in the driveway. Stunned and awed, I continued to gaze outside. A juvenile racoon sauntered by while five feet above it a hummingbird flitted seeking the nectar from the feeder. Faithful Street certainly felt like an urban wilderness. I marvelled at how these creatures have managed to adapt to our encroachment. I wonder how we will adapt when the same happens to us.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Sometimes When I Sit Very Still


Sometimes when I sit very still 
I can hear the world breathing
A slow steady flow, a reliable heart beat
Which is likely my own intrinsically connected
To this universal breath
Yes, inhale. 
Yes, exhale. 
Yes, a pause, a turning of the breath 
Yes, a breath that is the energetic hum, 
the universal aum that not only penetrates 
and emanates from all this is but is this all
The essential hum that inhales all form 
Then with barely a pause exhales all, formless

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Joy Of Joys ~ I Will


Joy of Joys.
Today, in the mail, came "Singing This Love", a song book of music and lyrics of Kirtana. All songs from "Falling Awake", "A Deeper Surrender", "This Embrace" & "The Offering" and selected songs from her earlier, pre Gangaji albums, "Healing Rain" and "Parrish Light". I promptly down loaded the two earlier albums and was lifted up by the song of joy with this gem, "I Will".  As of this writing, I could not find it on You Tube. Perhaps you'd like to download the album(s) from CD Baby.

Here are the lyrics.  

I Will


Most of the time life makes sense.
God is a verb in the present tense
Who knows about every sparrow that falls.
But I lose faith fast i must confess
When I'm crying out in the wilderness
Like a lone wolf
And no one returns my calls.


That endless blue can take you to
And existential point of view
Where the only meaning you can find you bring.
So just in case no one's there
To listen to my dreams and prayers -
Just in case no one cares
I will.


I will. I will. If nobody else will I will.
I will. I will. If nobody else will I will.


I believe in love and those twists of fate
That lead to friends or an ideal mate.
I've been feeling pretty lucky of late
(knock on wood).
But who can ever say what's around the bend.
I can't depend on a lover or a friend
To stick with me to the bitter end
So i will.


I will. I will. if nobody else will I will.
I will. I will. if nobody else will I will.


Every time i seek truth or solace
Outside my self
I just can't find anywhere to turn.
If from dust we come
And to dust we go it seems to me
The answers must lie somewhere in between.


Like here and now. 
But it’s hard to understand 
harder to bear when people seem to 
suffer more than their share 
of sickness, poverty and grief.
Although I believe in a perfect plan 
and the intrinsic good of man 
it doesn’t take much to challenge my belief. 


But maybe I don't need to understand
To take a stand or take a hand
Or make a change however small it is.
Maybe i don't even need to know how.
Maybe it's enough right now
For me to make a simple vow that I will.


I will. I will. If nobody else will I will.
I will. I will. If nobody else will I will.


I will. I will. If nobody else will I will.
I will. I will. If nobody else will I will.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Rebecca Rose


Rebecca Rose
June 12, 1987 
"Love Created You Like Itself"
A Course In Miracles
In the wee hours of the morning, June 12, 1987, we were blessed. 







All in attendance were awed by the miracle of the birth of Rebecca Rose. After a long and arduous labour, Rebecca came into the world without a peep. 
Her beautiful eyes gazed with both innocence and knowing as she opened and closed her hand. The world is truly a better place for this young woman, 25 today, who is so full of compassion, care and love. I am honoured and deeply humbled that she chose me as her mother. 
Five years ago, another blessing with the birth of Teagan Ivy-Mae, now I am a Nana.

Happy Birthday Bekkie!  
All my love, always, Mom

Thursday, June 7, 2012

A Wake Up Call


What are we here for?  I mean here in our bodies, on this planet, year 2012, at this evolutionary point in humankind’s creation. If you’ve been reading the Pigasus Project, or even if you haven’t, my belief, thought, goal, was to Wake Up. Funny thing is that believing, thinking and making waking up a goal are perhaps the antithesis to something that cannot be objectified, cannot be sought. Simply, Wake Up means being present. Seeking and searching is focussing elsewhere outside this being for “the answer.” Funny thing number two is that angsting and suffering over waking up is so far away from the Truth it’s like sitting in the nosebleeds and watching someone else play your life. 
From here, now, and I can’t say it’s definitely so or it t’ain’t so, it seems the missing piece perhaps is Joy. 
I mean when I really stop and take a critical look at the train wreck I call “my” life, I just have to laugh. Headline should read, Trauma Queen Takes Life Too Seriously. I’m just chuckling about this whole amazing and amusing game called “Hide ‘n Seek”. Sitting with fingers crossed hoping the future will be better is scary and not very fun. It’s darn stressful! To be sure, everything comes and goes, so what!  
Since all of what I am living now is simply the creation of a past me vibrating negatively or positively and attracting the people and circumstances that match that vibration why don’t I vibrate differently. Play the game holding the Joy card. Nothing is fixed or permanent and really the only thing I know for sure is that someday this skin bag of bones is going to be shed as easily as an actor changes costumes.  
What a blessing that I know at some moment I will die. Got it. I, we, can’t escape the inevitable. What I can do until that final moment of dissolution is live a playful life of Joy. Joy in setting free that sadly imprisoned true me held captive by the shoulds and shouldn’ts, dids and didn’ts. I’ve been good at acting the role of victim. What about, just for the fun of it, I choose Victim No More. What if, for example, I choose to live this moment as if it were my last. As if there were no tomorrows or no yesterdays. 

What an irony there really is nothing other then this exact moment. Here the chase ends; now wake up and play!