Ok. It’s time. Enough procrastination. I’ve been tussling with an inner demon, “Not Good Enough.” Truly, I’ve allowed this fear to stop me from writing for a while because that nasty beast reared its head and I believed it. Without a doubt, I “knew” the writing was not good enough. Tangled up in this web of self doubt are threads of self sabotage. Why do I fear success? Why do I shrink from letting true writing me shine through? It’s not that I don’t have my own writer’s voice, I’ve been writing long enough to know this voice is strong, capable and literate. So, I don’t really know if I can answer the why perhaps Marianne Williamson can remind me, again.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
There, said succinctly, now I simply need to practice it. It’s a strange thing, I cheerlead for everyone else, except me. Perhaps my resolution for 2013 is: “I have the right to be here and a right to express myself.”
Enough is Enough; I am Enough.